


Unspoken Desire

by Wolfsbride



Category: Les Misérables RPF
Genre: Age Difference, Foot Fetish, Foot Jobs, Foot Massage, M/M, Older Man/Younger Man
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-24
Updated: 2014-02-24
Packaged: 2018-01-13 14:20:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1229677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wolfsbride/pseuds/Wolfsbride
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ramin discovers a secret need. Colm sees no reason to deny him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Unspoken Desire

**Author's Note:**

  * For [RimauSuaLay](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RimauSuaLay/gifts), [Tinnean](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tinnean/gifts), [tvovealt](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=tvovealt), [voksen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/voksen/gifts), [X](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=X).



It’s the evening of the Les Misérables’ special charity event and Colm is finished with his role of Bishop. He’s left both the character and the costume back at the theatre and has had a shower in his hotel suite, changing into a plain cotton shirt and trousers.

Now he’s wandering around Ramin’s hotel suite, because, as usual, he wants to be where Ramin is. It’s quite ridiculous. Ramin makes him feel all of twenty, even though he’s three times that age and more. He can’t stop _smiling_ when he’s around him. He’s lucky people think it’s because he’s so proud of the young star. He is, but more than that, he’s head over heels in love. He can’t believe no one has noticed how he feels.

It should be embarrassing. He remembers his younger self rolling his eyes at people that behaved like him – all soppy and touchy feely. Now he’s the one making sheep’s eyes. How times change. 

When Cameron had suggested the charity event, he’d jumped at the chance to play the Bishop opposite Ramin’s Valjean. With their busy schedules, he and Ramin had to work hard to find time to spend together. Any time, even if it was solely in a professional manner, was appreciated. 

Right now, he’s waiting for Ramin to finish his shower, and then they’ll probably order a simple meal and spend the next several hours chatting. One of the reasons that Ramin is such an excellent performer is how intense he is with his roles. It also means sometimes he needs help coming down from a performance. Colm doesn’t mind filling that need.

He continues pacing around, stopping every few seconds to wiggle his toes deep in the shag carpeting. He’d taken off his shoes as soon as he’d entered Ramin’s suite. His own suite is an exact replica in terms of decorating and the pile was so soft and plush; he loved how it felt on his soles and between his toes. Walking around in his suite had been a pleasure. He saw no reason to deny himself the sensation, even though he’s currently visiting Ramin. Several times he closes his eyes; it’s such a heavenly feeling.

It’s on one of these occasions that Ramin enters the living area of the suite. He stops short when he sees Colm standing there with his eyes shut. He pretends that his shiver is due to not having bothered with a shirt after his shower. His gaze drops to Colm’s feet and another little frisson of excitement runs through him as he watches Colm’s toes flex. 

He tries to shake the feeling off but doesn’t succeed. It’s been humming under his skin all night. Having Colm on stage with him; getting to perform more than two lines with him; getting to _sing_ with him again; it’s everything he’s ever dreamed of. However, the reality has been so far removed from the dream he’s still having trouble absorbing it. 

He wonders if perhaps he should have made some excuse when Colm invited himself over. He’s been off balance all evening. It started during the show with his first glimpse of Colm’s bare feet. He’d been startled by his reaction and it was only due to sheer professionalism that he’d managed to make it through the show without doing something insane in front of thousands of people. Especially when he’d chosen to kneel at Colm’s feet during the scene with the candle sticks.

Now he’s here alone with Colm and while they have chosen to keep their relationship under wraps thus far, they _are_ in a relationship, his first with a man, and he’s feeling a pressing need to consummate the damn thing pretty much right this minute. Which is probably rude. He should at least feed Colm first or something. 

Ramin shakes his head as though the physical act will knock his train of thought off its rails and clears his throat. “Hey, Old Man. Have you gone to sleep standing up?”

Colm opens his eyes and turns his head to look at Ramin. He glares without heat. “Don’t begrudge an old man his pleasure.” 

Then he smiles beauteously. It’s the smile that says ‘I’m so fucking proud of you’. It’s the smile that makes Ramin feel like he’s some sort of super hero. 

“Are you hungry?” He needs to distract himself before he molests Colm. Or at least until he figures out if Colm wants to be molested. They’ve done the whole making out like teenagers routine but they usually end up all hot and bothered and panting and then they work on calming down.

He’s not sure if it’s because Colm isn’t interested in sex – and good God, wouldn’t that be a shame – or if it’s because Colm is being polite and waiting on him to make a move. He’s most definitely up for making a move but he doesn’t want to send Colm running. He’s not entirely sure how to broach the subject. ‘Hey, wanna have sex?’ seems a bit gauche. Has it really been that long since he’s dated that he’s forgotten how these things go?

A hand on his bare arm startles him out of his thoughts. He’s even more surprised when Colm starts tracing the edges of the tattoo on his lower arm. It seems to be a wholly unconscious gesture but it still makes the skin under Colm’s fingertips tingle. He supresses a shudder. 

“Are you alright?” Colm is looking at him with concern.

Ramin forces himself to ignore the heat where Colm is touching him. “Uh. Yeah. Sorry. Still a bit overwhelmed. You were pretty amazing.”

Colm scoffs and pulls Ramin into a hug. 

Ramin lets him because Colm’s hugs are awesome but he does try to keep his hips out of the way. All his thinking about sex has had a predictable effect on his body. He doesn’t want Colm to get the wrong… Well, the right idea. He’d like to give Colm a chance to relax before he jumps him. For now, he lets himself enjoy Colm’s obvious affection. 

He’s so damn fortunate to have found this. He still has a hard time believing it most days. How many people are lucky enough to have someone to anchor them but also encourage them to pursue their dreams? He’s sure he could have made it on his own; but he’s equally sure that it would have taken him much longer to get where he is today without Colm’s guidance and support. Having Colm’s love is just the icing on the cake. 

When Colm shows no signs of letting him go, Ramin carefully disengages, patting Colm firmly on the back as he does so. “Food.” He says. More as a reminder to himself than anything else. He deliberately does not look down at Colm’s bare feet. “What do you fancy?” Ramin asks as he walks over to the phone. 

Colm’s response is immediate and heartfelt. “You.”

Ramin stumbles just a tiny bit at that. He hopes he’s covered it well. He looks over his shoulder to see Colm still looking at him. His smile is smaller but no less radiant and Ramin wishes he knew whether or not Colm was making a pass at him. He decides to play it safe for now.

“Sorry, but I’m not on the menu.”

“Pity.”

A faint tinge of disappointment surrounds the word and Ramin turns away before he forgets himself. He asks for two orders of the Tomato Basil Soup with half a baguette – he figures they can split it between the two of them – thanks the concierge and then hangs up. He finds himself taking a minute to steady himself, which is absurd. He’s known Colm for years; he shouldn’t be this nervous.

When he finally does turn around, he sees Colm sitting on the couch, his feet propped up on the small coffee table. He stares. He shouldn’t, but he can’t help it. His gaze just seems to be drawn in that direction.

Colm’s feet are a shade paler than his face or hands and oddly they look much smaller than when he’s wearing shoes. Ramin wouldn’t go so far as to call them dainty but they do look adorable sticking out from the bottoms of Colm’s cotton trousers. He gets the overwhelming urge to touch Colm’s ankles, to circle the bony protrusions with his fingers. Clearly he’s losing his mind.

Ramin hesitates a moment and then goes to sit on the couch with Colm instead of the smaller loveseat that is at a right angle to the couch. That would just raise Colm’s suspicions and he’s not sure he can explain himself to Colm when he can’t seem to justify his behaviour to himself. Even so, he sits next to the arm of the couch and not in the middle, where he would be closer to Colm.

Colm raises a brow at him, but says nothing.

Nervously, Ramin rubs a palm over his short cropped hair and then scowls when he’s reminded of Colm putting a hand on his head during their interview about the charity show. It really had felt like a blessing at the time and he’d reacted instinctively. It was only afterwards when he’d watched the tape that he realized he’d said ‘I like that’ loud enough for their microphones to pick up. 

Colm had teased him relentlessly, scuffing his buzz cut at every opportunity. Ramin put up with it because he _liked_ being touched by Colm, even if it was in a non-sexual way. It also made him happy to see how much delight Colm took in such a simple thing.

Which is why he’s so frustrated with himself. He’s acting like a blushing virgin just because he’s noticed something about Colm that never registered before. They’re just feet for God’s sake!

He looks down at his own feet, as bare as Colm’s own, but more tanned, and wiggles his toes. The action sparks nothing inside him but a vague comparison. Out of the corner of his eye, he gets a partial view of Colm’s left foot and is immediately entranced by the fact that Colm seems to have no arch. His fingers twitch with the need to trace the straight line of Colm’s sole.

Ramin jerks his gaze away and tries to suppress his flush. It’s awkward, this weird attraction he seems to have developed. He rubs his hands against the coarse fabric of his sweat pants trying to replace the phantom sensation of Colm’s skin touching his own. 

He feels Colm shift on his side of the couch. “Ramin, are you sure you’re alright?”

He’s saved from answering by a knock on the door. He scrambles to his feet and hurries out of the living area and into the hall.

Colm watches Ramin flee with a frown. He wishes he knew what was going through his young friend’s mind for him to be running away like that. He knows there’s still a lot of hero worship wrapped up in what Ramin feels for him but it’s been years since Ramin has been shy like this in his presence. 

Vaguely listening to Ramin talking to the room service attendant, Colm ponders the change. Tonight’s performance seems to have been the trigger. He’s not a prideful man but he has to wonder if sharing the stage with him was more of a problem than Ramin let on.

When Ramin comes back into the living area pushing the room service trolley, Colm sits up, feet dropping to the floor. He digs his toes into the carpet again. He smiles at Ramin as he brings the tray over. Waiting until Ramin uncovers their meal and places everything just so; he then pats the cushion next to him.

“Not so far away this time.” He murmurs. “I won’t bite. Unless you want me to.”

He doesn’t miss how Ramin flushes despite his darker skin tone; nor had he missed the way Ramin paused when he’d sat up. He’s usually content to let Ramin lead but this time around he feels he might just have to press the issue. He’s already asked twice and Ramin doesn’t seem willing to talk about what’s bothering him.

When Ramin finally sits, Colm takes up the baguette. He breaks it in half and passes one piece to Ramin before helping himself to a generous portion of the butter provided. Taking a sip of the soup, he sighs happily as the flavour bursts on his tongue. He turns his head to see Ramin watching him intently. 

“What?”

Ramin grins, dimples showing. “Nothing. I just feel like I should make a quip about Valjean and bread.”

Colm snorts; amused. He gestures to Ramin’s bowl currently sitting untouched. “Don’t let me keep you. It’s very good.”

Ramin does the same as Colm with his baguette, but with a little less butter. He forgoes using the spoon and tears off a chunk that he then dips into the soup. Upon sampling, he nods his head in agreement. “It is good.” He mumbles.

Both men turn their attention to the soup. 

After a few minutes, Colm fixes his gaze on Ramin again. “So. Will you tell me what’s bothering you? And don’t say it’s nothing. You’ve been drifting off. That’s more than just after show jitters.” Colm pauses. There’s that old saying about not asking questions you don’t want to know the answers to but for both their sakes he takes the plunge. “Should I not have accepted the offer to play the Bishop?”

Ramin jerks so hard he nearly spills his soup. 

Colm stares at the long line of Ramin’s throat, observes his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallows. He stops his gaze from trailing lower, over Ramin’s broad chest and large biceps. Focus is important.

Ramin breathes deeply and then sets his half-finished bowl of soup and baguette back on the tray. He shifts around on the couch so that he’s facing Colm. 

Sensing the seriousness, Colm follows suit. 

Taking Colm’s hands in his, Ramin squeezes them gently. “No moment in my career has come close to tonight. To have shared that with you...” Ramin shakes his head. “I wish I could play opposite you every night.”

Colm grips Ramin’s hands in return. “Thank God. I was worried you were feeling upstaged.”

Seeing his profound relief, Ramin chastises himself for letting his confusion make Colm feel bad. He doesn’t feel secure enough to voice his thoughts, however, so he makes a conscious decision to divert Colm from the conversation. Freeing a hand, he places it on the back of Colm’s neck and pulls him into a kiss. 

They’ve done this hundreds of times and it’s as familiar, yet as exciting as ever. He can taste the tomato and basil on Colm’s tongue and he leans in, pressing Colm into the back of the couch as he deepens the kiss. His excitement grows when Colm responds, tongue sliding over his own.

When he pulls away to breathe, the two of them are flushed. Colm smiles at him, eyes bright, and he has to dip his head and kiss him once more. He continues in this manner, pressing little kisses all over Colm’s face. He rubs his beard over Colm’s cheeks and neck making him gasp. 

Colm’s hands are grasping at his shoulders, nails biting into the meaty flesh. Ramin trembles as they slip lower, kneading his biceps. Again he feels the tips of Colm’s fingers following the curve of one of his tattoos and he smiles into the crook of Colm’s neck. 

His grin slips from his face, however, when Colm’s hands slides between their chests and rubs over his nipples. He hisses as his spine arches, pressing the now sensitive flesh harder against Colm’s palms. When the calloused tips of Colm’s fingers catch at a nipple and tweaks and twists, he can’t contain his shout.

Blearily, through all the sensations, he remembers what he was thinking earlier and lifting his head, he decides to skip being subtle. Looking at Colm, he presses against his thigh so that there’s no mistaking his intention. “I want to screw you into the bed. Do you mind?”

Colm laughs; short and joyous. “I was beginning to think you’d never ask. I’m not getting any younger you know.”

Ramin scowls. “You could have _said_! I’ve been going crazy wondering about it.”

Colm’s grin fades. Lifting a hand, he runs it over Ramin’s shorn hair. “It had to be your decision. I didn’t want to influence you.”

Ramin presses into Colm’s touch, sighing as he does so. Of course. He should have known really. Colm has always been very conscious of the huge difference in their ages; has always been careful not to use his admiration against him. It’s one of the many things that made him fall in love.

“You sure?” He asks, because Colm’s not the only one who doesn’t want to mess this up.

Colm is silent and serious for a minute and Ramin begins to worry.

“I’m sure it’ll be a hardship to let my young and sexy lover have his wicked way with me but I’ll manage to cope, somehow.”

Ramin glowers and then gets his revenge by rubbing his chin in the crook of Colm’s neck until he yelps and smacks at his shoulders.

Ramin sits up properly and then stands. He catches Colm staring at his crotch where he’s making a sizable tent in his sweat pants. He refuses to feel self-conscious. It’s Colm’s fault after all. He holds out a hand and braces himself as Colm grasps it and gets up. 

He keeps holding on to Colm’s hand and pulls him closer. Now that he knows Colm wants him to set the pace, he feels more confident. He kisses him for a bit; just to get the fires stoked again, and then draws back. Turning, he leads the way to the bedroom tugging Colm along behind him.

In the bedroom, Ramin strips Colm of his shirt. He runs his hands over his torso enjoying the rough texture of his skin. Colm isn’t buff but he is in pretty good shape for a man about to turn seventy. If he’s honest, Ramin quite likes the fact that Colm is soft and fleshy. He squeezes his waist firmly.

Colm smiles as he places his hands on Ramin’s forearms. “Is that a complaint about my love handles?”

Stepping closer, Ramin nuzzles Colm’s face. “I adore your love handles.” He whispers just before he nibbles on Colm’s ear.

Shuddering, Colm clutches Ramin’s arms. “Bed. Now. Please.”

Simple words but the roughened tone spikes Ramin’s arousal and he walks Colm toward the bed and down when the backs of Colm’s knees hit the mattress. Sprawled over him, he can feel Colm’s erection digging into the inside of his thigh as he imagines Colm can feel his own. He kisses Colm again and revels in the way that Colm kisses him back, hard and deep. 

Colm may be letting him take charge, but he’s not lying passive and that makes him feel better about the whole thing. He moans when Colm strokes his bare back. His skin is prickles under Colm’s touch. When Colm runs his fingernails over Ramin’s shoulder blades and the bumps of his spine, Ramin groans into to the kiss. 

Colm’s legs spread to make room for him and he begins to rock back and forth. Ramin gets the hint that it’s time to move on. Reluctantly, he drags himself away from Colm’s mouth.

Wiggling down on the bed, Ramin pauses by Colm’s waist, smiling at the tent that Colm is sporting. Turning his head, he rubs his cheek over the cotton fabric that hides the taut flesh. This elicits a moan from Colm. Spurred on, Ramin draws back slightly, enough that he can mouth the head of Colm’s cock through his trousers. 

Fingers clasp at his head as he works over and around the tip. Ramin ignores the increasingly frantic movements and concentrates solely on learning the shape and smell of his lover. After several minutes, he gets a faint taste of salt through the cloth and he lifts his head to look up at Colm.

Colm stares down at him, flushed and gasping. “Enough with the foreplay; let’s get to the main event.”

Ramin grins. God, but he loves this man.

Pushing himself up, he kneels over Colm and unbuttons and unzips his trousers. Hooking his fingers into the waistband, he waits for Colm to lift up and then he slides them down, smirking when he sees that Colm is not wearing any underwear. He shuffles his way down the bed dragging the trousers with him until they lie in a heap on the bedroom floor. 

Ramin starts to make his way back onto the bed but he’s distracted by Colm’s feet which are now right in front of his face. He freezes at the sight. Both Colm’s soles are flat and his toes are straight and slender. They look just right for sucking.

The ball and heel of his feet are equally calloused and Ramin really wants to run his fingertips over the grainy skin. Or maybe his tongue. He’s aware that his breathing and heart rate are increasing and his cock is swelling rapidly.

He doesn’t understand why these thoughts are in his head. He shouldn’t want to stare at Colm’s feet; to stroke them; to lick them even. Feet spend most of their time in shoes being all sweaty. The idea shouldn’t be so appealing. 

But Colm’s feet are almost under his nose. He’s close enough the he can see the faint blue veins that line them. If he leans just a little closer, he could even smell them. Giving in to his desire, Ramin closes the gap and presses his nose to the side of Colm’s foot. 

Colm’s foot smells of soap and dust, from the deep pile carpet, Ramin guesses. Unsanitary as it may be, Ramin can’t help but kiss Colm’s instep. Colm’s foot jerks in response. When Ramin looks up, Colm is propped up on his elbows staring down the bed at him with an odd expression on his face. 

Ramin ducks his head. He can feel his ears burning. Now his heart is pounding for a different reason.

“Did… Did you just kiss my foot?”

Ramin can’t tell from Colm’s tone what he’s thinking. Is he mocking? Is he disgusted? He doesn’t really want to answer but being silent will make everything stranger.

“Yes. I…” He’s about to try to explain himself though he doesn’t know how, when Colm chuckles.

“What an odd thing to do.”

It’s not said unkindly but still it quenches some of Ramin’s arousal. He doesn’t want to ruin the mood though, so he quickly wiggles out of his sweat pants and starts the whole thing over again by kissing his way back up Colm’s body, focusing on the areas that make Colm squirm and arch beneath him. By the time he reaches Colm’s face once more, Colm is breathing heavily and gripping his shoulders. 

He kisses Colm deeply, groaning into his mouth as their cocks rub together. In the back of his mind there’s a tiny part of him that is wistfully thinking about Colm’s feet but mostly what’s happening now is great. He’s not prepared for anything complicated so his earlier announcement about screwing Colm to the bed will have been an empty boast. However, with the way Colm is gasping his name as their hips rock together and their cocks slide over and under each other, Ramin thinks that Colm doesn’t mind. 

A few minutes later, thinking becomes impossible as all his attention focuses on his rapidly approaching climax. The touch of Colm’s fingers as they dig into his back when Colm stiffens beneath him winds his arousal higher. When he feels the warmth of Colm’s climax on his skin, Ramin’s hips grind down once, twice and then he too stills before jerking a final time. 

The two of them lay panting for several minutes before Ramin shakily pushes himself up off Colm. He disappears into the bathroom and returns with a warm washcloth. Colm blinks slowly and smiles up at Ramin as he carefully cleans first Colm, and then himself. Tossing the wash cloth aside, Ramin gently tugs the covers from under Colm who barely moves.

“You still with me, old man?” 

Colm smacks his arm weakly, then tugs him into bed. Ramin draws the covers up and then hugs Colm when he plasters himself along Ramin’s side. The silence stretches not unpleasantly. Ramin is thinking Colm has fallen asleep when Colm speaks.

“Was it good for you, honey?” The exhausted slurring of Colm’s accent does nothing to hide the mischievous tone. 

Just for that, Ramin pinches Colm lightly, chuckling when Colm twitches and snickers into his shoulder. “Twat,” Ramin says fondly.

Colm lifts his head and stares at him. “Was it what you needed? What you expected?”

Ramin hesitates. 

Colm rushes on. “I know I’m an old man…”

Ramin doesn’t give him a chance to finish. “Oh my God. Just shut up. It was fantastic. And even if it wasn’t, a relationship is more than interlocking parts.” 

Ramin kisses Colm again, mostly to keep him from babbling more nonsense. He draws back slowly, rubbing his nose against Colm’s before pulling away completely. He grins.

“Besides, shouldn’t I be asking you that? You’re the one that was holding out.”

“Only because I didn’t want to push you into something you didn’t want or weren’t ready for.” Colm yawns broadly and then tucks himself back along Ramin’s side. “As long as you’re happy.”

As Colm drifts off to sleep, Ramin lays thinking, not only of how amazing the sex had been, but also about his reaction to Colm's feet. The more he thinks about it, the more annoyed he gets until finally when he is sure Colm is fast asleep, he eases his way out of his embrace and slips off the bed, dragging the covers down as he does so.

It’s ludicrous. Feet are feet, nothing special. He goes to the end of the bed and sits down slowly so as not to wake Colm. Once he’s made sure that Colm is unlikely to stir, he turns his gaze to the objects of his fascination.

He has the notion that his reactions so far this evening have been an anomaly, brought on by the uniqueness of the whole event. He’s never had any inkling of desire toward anyone else’s feet in his life. There’s no reason why that should have changed. He can’t help thinking that if he can just focus on Colm’s feet without the distraction of Colm moving around, he might be able to overcome his preoccupation. 

Colm’s feet are short and broad, sturdy. Unlike his own feet, Colm’s big toe is slightly shorter than the rest of his toes. There’s a half inch gap between the big toe and the others and the smaller ones are cramped together; staggered and slumped like tired men. 

There’s nothing that should be sexy about Colm’s feet but Ramin feels the pull once more. He’s swamped with the need to touch; to measure the span of Colm’s instep with his fingers; to memorize the texture of Colm’s skin. He’s reaching out before he consciously realizes what he’s doing. It’s only the vivid contrast of his skin tone against Colm’s that startles him into jerking his hand back. 

Obviously not even having Colm out cold is a deterrent. He doesn’t know what he’s going to do. Getting up, he brings the sheets back up over Colm’s body and slips out of the bedroom.

~*~*~*~*~*~

Colm waits in Ramin’s suite, having picked up the extra key card his young lover had left for him. It’s a different evening and a different hotel suite, though one wouldn’t know it from the layout. The downside to performing in theatres all over the world is you forget what home is like. He and Ramin have been lucky enough to steal some time for themselves outside their busy schedules. Not nearly enough though; it’s never enough.

He knows he’s too early. Ramin’s flight won’t be in for a few hours yet, but he couldn’t stay at home alone any longer. It’s careless of him really. It’s one thing to show up after the fact; an old friend looking to catch up on events. It’s quite another to appear before the guest has even arrived. 

If the concierge recognized him, he didn’t show it; just passed him the card without batting a lash. He supposes it’s in the hotel’s policy to be discreet but humans are flawed beings and it would only take a few negative whispers to turn everything to chaos. Fortunately, no one has seen through the whole mentor/mentee personas.

It’s quite the double standard. If Ramin were female there would be no shocked reactions, in spite of his age. In fact, he would probably get a lot of sly comments. It’s alright for an old man to have a young female lover, but not a male one. 

Sometimes, he wonders if Ramin gets tired of being so careful. For himself, he has some leeway. Because of his age, if he touches Ramin a bit too much, or lets his hand linger a bit too long, no one will think a great deal about it. It’s considered cute that he dotes on Ramin. He can just imagine what people would think or say if Ramin did the same.

Colm paces, bare foot again, but this time the feel of the plush carpet doesn’t hold his attention. He circles the couch and love seat, walks down the hallway and back, through the small kitchenette and around to the couch and love seat yet again. He avoids the bedroom completely, thinking about the past few months, specifically his sexual relations with Ramin. Sex with Ramin would be fantastic, except for the fact that there was always a point at which Ramin seemed to get distracted before yanking himself back from whatever place he’d mentally wandered off to. His body language had changed as well. 

To someone more inexperienced, Ramin might have seemed shy in his overtures but somehow to Colm it seemed more like he was ashamed. Ramin would be very into their make out sessions and then he would almost pause completely before composing himself. Though, it only happened when Ramin was making love to him, never the other way around. Colm found that more and more, he was the one initiating their sexual encounters, while Ramin lay passive beneath him, as if he was afraid of doing something wrong.

He’s determined to get to the bottom of it. Sex is supposed to be enjoyed fully by both parties. And right now, it felt like Ramin was getting the short end of the stick. 

Colm is drawn out of his thoughts by the sound of the opening of the hotel suite door. Turning, he goes to meet Ramin, pulling him into a tight hug before clapping him on the back and letting him go. He steps back so Ramin can move past him and then follows him back into the main area of the suite. 

Ramin sets his small travel case in the corner, slips off his shoes and sits down on the couch. Colm sits beside him and watches as Ramin slumps against the back of the couch. 

“Bad flight?”

Ramin makes a face. “Babies and turbulence do not make good partners.”

Colm runs a hand through Ramin’s short curls. Enough time has passed since the Les Miz run that Ramin’s hair is halfway between its regular length and the buzz cut he sported as Valjean. It makes him look like a cherub. He smiles as Ramin leans into his touch. 

“What do you need?” He’s willing to let Ramin sleep or eat before pressing him for answers. Whatever the problem is, it has gone on for this long; a few more hours won’t make a difference.

Lifting his head, Ramin looks at him. He must see something in Colm’s face because he straightens up and turns so that he is looking at him directly.

“What’s wrong?”

It takes Colm a moment before he can speak. He’s trying to figure out what he wants to say and how he wants to say it. He doesn’t want to make Ramin anymore uncomfortable than he is about the subject. 

“I feel as though you’re not getting enough from our sexual encounters.”

Ramin blinks, blushes and then looks away. “I was hoping you wouldn’t notice.”

Colm waits, watching as Ramin fidgets. Finally, when it becomes apparent that Ramin still can’t verbalize what is troubling him, Colm takes Ramin’s hand in his. “Please. Tell me. If it’s something you need me to do…”

“No.” Ramin tries to jerk his hand away but Colm holds fast. Realizing that he’s not going to be able to avoid or deter Colm from the conversation any longer, Ramin squeezes his hand. “I… I don’t know if I can tell you. It’s embarrassing.” Ramin continues to avoid Colm’s gaze as he goes on, his voice now barely audible. “I don’t want to disgust you.”

Colm’s heart breaks. Has Ramin been carrying this around all this time? Shifting back against the arm of the couch, Colm tugs and pulls at Ramin until he gets him turned and positioned how he wants him. Ramin’s back is now pressed tight against Colm’s chest with Colm’s arms snug around him. Their hips are pushed together and their legs tangled due to the narrowness of the couch. Colm’s hoping that it will be easier for Ramin to talk if he doesn’t have to look directly at him. 

Breathing deeply, Colm considers how to deal with the issue at hand. He frees an arm from holding Ramin and begins to card his fingers through Ramin’s hair. He knows how much Ramin likes the feeling. Finally, when he feels like he has the right words, he speaks. “There’s very little you could tell me that would disgust me.”

Ramin makes a scoffing noise. 

Colm can almost hear Ramin rolling his eyes. His lips twitch and he gives Ramin’s hair a gentle yank. “I’m serious. I mean you’re not harbouring affections for small children, are you?”

A negative shake of the head is his answer.

“Dead people? Animals? Bodily functions?”

Each question got a negative response and Colm was pretty sure that after his last prompting Ramin was now quashing his laughter. That was a marked improvement. “See. Anything else would surprise me, not disgust me.”

Ramin’s chest heaves with the depth of his sigh.

Colm resumes petting Ramin’s hair. “Would it help if _I_ talked about it? Then you could just tell me if I got it right.” Colm forces himself not to react when Ramin tenses. The response lasts only a few seconds and then Ramin is relaxing back against him once more. His hair brushes Colm’s chin when he turns his head and nods slightly. 

Since he’d already been pondering the subject earlier, Colm easily slips back into his former train of thought. He considers their times together in specifics rather than generalities, trying to narrow in on the point that is causing Ramin such distress. He reflects on their first time, on the way Ramin had behaved even before they’d thought about taking things to the bedroom. Suddenly he has the clear memory of Ramin kissing his foot and himself laughing and calling Ramin’s behaviour odd. God, what an idiot he is.

Twisting his head, Colm presses a kiss to Ramin’s temple. “I’m so sorry. I never meant to make you feel bad about your desires.” Colm runs the sole of his foot over Ramin’s sock covered instep. He knows he’s right when Ramin shivers imperceptibly. 

“It’s stupid.” Ramin grumbles.

Colm decides that for this part of the conversation at least, he needs to be looking Ramin in the eye. He’s shifts from holding Ramin to putting a hand on his back and pushing gently. When Ramin sits up and turns back to him, Colm takes his hand again to make sure he doesn’t escape. “Look at me.” 

It takes a moment, but Ramin finally lifts his gaze from the carpet and meets Colm’s. What he sees there makes Colm want to smack himself. Ramin is looking at him like he expects to be mocked. 

Firming his grip, Colm tries to keep his expression open so that Ramin will see he’s sincere. “You don’t think it’s stupid that I really like your tattoo, do you?” Colm trails the fingers of his free hand over Ramin’s arm where the marks would show if he weren’t wearing a shirt. He doesn’t need to see; he has the flowing lines memorized.

“That’s different.” 

Colm shakes the hand holding Ramin’s in lieu of shaking Ramin himself. “No, it’s not. Look. My feet aren’t an erogenous zone for me, but obviously it works for you so… you know… if you want to… do stuff… I don’t know.” Here Colm shrugs. He can’t really imagine getting sexually aroused by someone’s feet but he remembers Ramin kissing his foot and it wasn’t something he would run away from, so why make a big deal about it?

Ramin reddens and ducks his head. “It’s… I… It’s not… It’s not important.” He mutters. 

Tucking two fingers under Ramin’s chin, Colm makes him lift his head. “Clearly it’s important to you; otherwise you wouldn’t be so unhappy.” He moves the two fingers to Ramin’s lips when Ramin tries to interrupt. “A relationship is two people compromising together, not one person constantly subjugating their needs for the other person. That way lays resentment.”

Lifting his hand away from Ramin’s mouth, Colm smiles. “So whatever you need; whatever makes you feel good.” A thought occurs to him and his smile fades away. “Well. Unless you’re planning to set my feet on fire. I’d have to draw the line at inflicting pain.”

Colm looks down at their joined hands. He rubs a thumb over Ramin’s knuckles. He hopes that Ramin will feel comfortable enough to take what he truly wants.

He hears Ramin chuckle a few seconds before Ramin slips his hand free and then cups a hand on either side of his face. He is pulled into the softest, sweetest kiss he’s ever had. When Ramin draws away, his gaze is warm and his face is clear of his previous doubts. “I’m so in love with you, I can’t even tell you how much.”

Colm’s always figured he was much too old to be caught blushing, but he can’t deny that his cheeks are heating up. He swallows the lump in his throat. “You know I feel the same way, right?”

Ramin nods. “I do now. And no pain. I just…” Ramin breathes deeply. “I want to touch them. Your feet, I mean. If… If that’s okay?”

That Ramin still manages to look timid even after their talk reminds Colm of how neglectful he’s been. He knows he’s Ramin’s first. He should have been more attentive. Hopefully, he can work on that. Settling more fully onto the couch, he stretches his legs out in front of him. “Whenever you’re ready.” Out of the corner of his eye, he can see Ramin chewing on his bottom lip. His gaze is fixed on Colm’s feet and Colm remembers this now, all the furtive glances, and calls himself a fool for taking so long to figure it out.

Ramin shakes himself out of his reverie and disappears first into the small bathroom, returning with a towel and a wash cloth thrown over his shoulder and then into the small kitchenette. There he takes longer. Colm can hear the sound of Ramin opening and closing the few cupboards, then the sound of the tap running for several minutes. When he returns to where Colm is seated, he is carrying a Tupperware bowl filled three quarters filled. 

Colm keeps his expression neutral but he’s intensely curious. When Ramin hesitates, Colm wiggles his foot. “Whatever you need,” he reminds Ramin. It’s amusing how Ramin sucks in a huge breath. He squelches his laughter. Perhaps later, when Ramin is surer of himself, it would be okay, but not now.

Ramin steadies his breathing and then slowly kneels at Colm’s feet, mindful of the bowl of water he is holding. A jolt of awareness runs through Colm. His feet may not be an erogenous zone but the sight of Ramin there, with his head bowed certainly is. 

When Ramin sets the bowl to one side and slips a bar of soap out of his trousers’ pocket, Colm really can’t help the laugh that breaks free. “Technically, aren’t _you_ the disciple?”

Ramin’s grin lets Colm know his laughter was taken in the way it was intended, not hurtful. 

“Hush. It’s my fantasy.” 

The blush that accompanies the words is truly delightful. Colm observes as Ramin soaks the wash cloth and then lathers the soap into it. He’s focused, long fingers rolling the soap over and over into the rough cloth. Colm remembers how those hands felt on his body and clears his throat. 

Ramin must take that as a nudge to proceed because he puts the soap down and carefully lifts Colm’s left foot, dragging the wash cloth down from ankle to toe over and over until the top of Colm’s foot is soaped. He repeats the movements on the underside of Colm’s foot. It would be soothing – the cloth is warm against his skin – if it wasn’t for the fact that Colm can hear Ramin’s breath deepening, can hear it speeding up. To his surprise he finds that his breathing is changing as well.

“The first time I thought about this, your feet, was at the charity show.”

Ramin’s voice startles Colm.

“I’d just knelt as you were handing me the candle sticks, and that felt right even though it wasn’t scripted, and then you stepped into my line of sight with your bare feet. I don’t know what it was about that or why but I haven’t been able to stop thinking about them since then.”

As he talks, Ramin is slowly running his fingers over and between Colm’s toes. He cups the ball of Colm’s foot with one hand while he strokes over Colm’s flat sole with the other. He trembles with each touch and Colm can feel Ramin’s hands shaking against his skin.

“Take off your shirt.” Colm didn’t know he was going to say that until the words came out of his mouth. It shouldn’t have surprised him though. He isn’t a shallow person and he doesn’t think he’d throw Ramin over if he suddenly became flabby but there’s something about watching Ramin’s muscles flexing beneath his skin that really gets to him. Plus he really wants to see Ramin’s tattoo.

Pausing, Ramin lowers Colm’s foot to the carpet and then leisurely begins to unbutton his shirt. He shrugs out of it and the way his shoulders rolled makes Colm’s palms itch. Some other time, Colm thinks. This is Ramin’s moment.

After holding still for a moment, Ramin glances at Colm from under his lashes before reaching out and lifting Colm’s foot again. He picks up where he left off, giving Colm an impromptu foot massage. It feels divine and Colm would be melting into the couch cushions if he wasn’t totally concentrating on the tensing and releasing of Ramin’s muscles. 

A few minutes pass before Ramin rinses out the wash cloth and wipes Colm’s foot clean of all the soap. He does this several times. And then he switches to right foot, repeating the procedure. By the time he’s finished, Colm can see that Ramin is aroused. Even if he wasn’t breathing heavily, his nipples are peaked and the front of his trousers are bulging. 

As hard as it is for Colm to believe, he is right there with Ramin, his own cock swollen and twitching in his trousers. He may not get a sexual thrill from having his feet handled, but seeing Ramin go from cool to hot just from touching his feet definitely gets his motor running. He’s yanked out of his thoughts when Ramin’s warm mouth closes around the big toe of his right foot. 

Ramin jerks back, nearly dropping Colm’s foot. “I’m sorry!”

Colm waves his apology away. “I’m not saying no.” His voice is rough. “You just took me by surprise. Go ahead.” He nods when Ramin is slow to respond.

Watching Ramin lean forward and suck his toe back into his mouth, makes Colm clutch at the cushions. He’s felt those lips around his prick and it’s a bit weird to realize the sensation is almost the same. He sort of wants to shove his foot harder against Ramin’s lips. He’s beginning to see why this appeals to Ramin.

Ramin sucks and licks at all of Colm’s toes, chasing the water droplets over the rough skin of his soles, curling his tongue around the knobs of Colm’s ankles. By the time he stops, there isn’t even any need for the towel that he’d brought from the bathroom. He sits back on his haunches, chest rising and falling rapidly. There’s a wet spot at the front of his trousers and his hands are twitching in that direction now that they’re no longer holding on to Colm. 

Colm’s breath is harsh; his own cock aching in sympathy. Ramin is looking at him mutely, pleading for something. Colm doesn’t even have to think about it. “Whatever you need; it’s yours.” His accent has deepened so much the words sound garbled but Ramin must understand because he gives a little whine and then fumbles with the front of his trousers. 

A moment of warmth and wetness is all it takes for Colm to understand and then he’s clawing at his own trousers’ front as Ramin gasps out his name while he ruts against Colm’s bare feet. Colm’s head tips back against the couch for a second as his hand closes around his cock but he doesn’t stay like that because he wants, he needs to see Ramin. So he lifts his head to look, jerking his cock in time to Ramin’s thrusts against his instep, his toes, his ankles.

Ramin is swearing, under his breath but loud enough that Colm can hear him. For some reason the swearing makes everything that much more insane and Colm has to push a hand into the front of his trousers to tug on his balls. He manages to reclaim enough brain cells to positions his feet so that the soles are facing each other. Now Ramin’s cock is rubbing between them and the swearing increases in volume. 

His feet are slick with Ramin’s essence and Colm has the faint thought that he’s going to need another foot wash when Ramin shouts his name and stiffens before coming all over his soles and insteps. Colm speeds up his movements and comes shortly after, spilling over his still pumping fist. He slumps back against the couch at about the exact time that Ramin slumps against his legs.

For several minutes the suite is filled with nothing but the sound of both men panting. Then Ramin groans and sits up. Colm lifts his head to look down at Ramin, blinking slowly until he focuses. He stares as Ramin dips the wash cloth in the water once more and reverently cleans off his feet. The water is tepid and so the wash cloth retains little heat. The cool, languorous swipes actually help bring him back to himself.

After making sure Colm’s feet are clean, Ramin dunks the wash cloth again. Ringing it out, Ramin kneels up and swipes the cloth over Colm’s hand. Colm shudders as the cloth drags over his cock. Ramin drops the cloth to the floor and eases Colm’s hand out of the way and then tucks him back into his trousers. Sitting back, Ramin fixes his own trousers before lifting his head to look at Colm. 

“I… Was… Was that alright? I know I got carried away.” 

Colm imagines that he can feel the heat of Ramin’s flush from where he’s sitting. The afterglow is still strong so his gesture for Ramin to join him on the couch is barely there. As soon as Ramin settles next to him, Colm hauls him close. 

“That was bloody marvelous. My feet are at your disposal anytime.” 

Ramin laughs and twists so that he fits more securely along the line of Colm’s body. Ducking his head, he kisses Colm’s throat. “Thanks. You know, for not freaking out. For talking it out when I couldn’t.” 

Colm hums. “You’re welcome. I’m glad we worked it out.” 

As Ramin relaxes next to him, Colm makes a mental note to be more in tune with Ramin’s needs from now on. He wants Ramin to feel confident enough to express his desires, whatever they may be. Like anything else, that will only come with practice.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks go to:
> 
> \- voksen for all the delicious links - two of which featured the pictures that sparked the original idea  
> \- RimauSuaLay for the gist of the plot  
> \- Tinnean for betaing and rereading this til I'm sure her eyes were falling out  
> \- X for pointing out the "I like that."  
> \- tvovealt for wanting new fic - sorry I didn't make the Valentines Day deadline
> 
> This was a real joint effort guys. Pat yourselves on the back.


End file.
